January 06, 2007 - 8:14 pm scizz & i are in the middle of a petty fight. i feel distant and lonely, we keep speaking to each other in short, curt sentences. cool, angry words. all i want to do is bury my face in his shoulder. sigh. he sure can drive me fucking mental as much as i love and adore him. i think, in happier times, that's what keeps our relationship healthy. right now i just want him to stop being so stubborn. in better news, i worked out for 90 minutes at the gym today. i keep thinking, DON'T SPEND ANOTHER YEAR FAT. sometimes it works. we played poker at john's work last night. there were about 90 or so people playing. i didn't go out first, but i certainly didn't make it to the final table. i sat on a table with all men, and stupidly mistook one hand for an ace/eight combination, bet big, and when i flipped my cards over... it was eight/FOUR. i spent the rest of the game in a silent shame and went out pretty quick after that. heh. currently listening to and i'm telling you i'm not going by jennifer whoever from idol/dreamgirls and the kill by the jared leto band. weird combination, but those are the only two songs on my playlist at the moment. ok, well, i've cheered myself up a bit. i might crawl over to scott now. maybe not.
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