September 11, 2007 - 8:18 am i have felt lost for a while now. i'm not entirely sure when it started... 6 months? 2 years? it's all blurred into one time span. i've felt like i was lost and unsure of myself and too concerned about what other people were thinking of me. but this is ME. for the most part, i know what i want and i don't care what other people think and would never let an opinion that i thought was wrong affect me or my decisions. but that whole idea seems to have faded and all my choices are muddied by other people. is this me getting older? is it just the wedding that's making me like this? i feel like i have not been myself in a long time. the only time i am myself is when i'm with scott on our own. i can't relax with other people. it's exhausting. the wedding is this weekend. we'll see how it goes.
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